My garbage man is infallible, the stork not so much

There are a handful of things that should have me worked up this week. For example:

• The state governor's "budget repair" bill besides sucking is not great news for teacher-is-the sole-breadwinner-in-our-family situation.
• Said teacher already has his layoff notice for technical education.
• Said teacher's special education seniority and license is pretty sure, but there is not contract in his hot little hands until May.
• Said special education teacher's student has scabies. Ewwwwwww. I am already pregnant and itchy, and I had to deal with a couple days worth of paranoid itchiness, too.
• The baby like to take long naps in the morning where you feel no baby movement for 3 hour spells. I went to the hospital for a non-stress test earlier this week. My discharge papers said to contact them if I didn't feel 10 movements an hour. Ha! I'd be there every morning.
• There is some jackass running for City Council in Appleton who is a part of some Preserving White Heritage and White Vision group. What a gem!

However, most of these things haven't really phased me. I have been able to say to myself, "we're having a baby, all is good." Maybe they are all out of my control, and there is no one person (besides Scott Walker) to blame. BUT. SOMEONE. HAS. MY. WRATH. I hope my garbage man likes mommy blogs and stumbles upon this. He is a jack ass.

We only have monthly recycling pick-up. With the composting and the cloth diapers, we really have very little garbage. My garbage is usually less than half full. However, my recycling container is packed to the gills. I don't know why we have so much recycling - Bob's 2L of Diet coke, whiskey bottles and milk gallons? But, we often have too much for the container. A couple months ago I found out the correct process for additional recycling. I had the requisite container and went to the City garage to pick up the requisite stickers. The first month, they picked it up. The second month, I didn't have a need for overflow. This month, I put it out half full, and they didn't pick it up. So, I called them to make sure I didn't make some mistake or this wasn't some new cost savings plan. I feel like my work experience in local government probably made me more eager to follow their rules than most residents.

I assured the woman on the phone the bucket was less than half full. No, it wasn't plum full of papers. It wasn't too heavy. It was mixed. Yes, it has the stickers - on both sides! My husband put it out before he went to work, probably around 6 AM. She places me on hold to call the driver with my address. When she gets back on the phone she tells me that the driver doesn't believe me that my bin was out there.

Yes, it's a scam. I have so much to gain by this scam. I am 39 1/2 weeks pregnant, and I find this to be a good use of my time, pulling one over on the man.

What kind of crap customer service from both of them?! I can't believe she didn't cover for the driver. Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones, but I was irate. It doesn't cost them anything to have good customer service. They could have even been sly and said, "Oh, something must have been missed." I would have even held onto it for a month, but by then I was just mad. Sure, yeah, you better make another run and get it.

I have been composing letters in my head to the Director of Public Works. "I didn't realize that these fine public servants are perfect. Give them a raise! They never make mistakes?!?"

Next pick-up date should I stand outside with my "shame" posters?

Even typing it, I feel a bit ridiculous.

So, yeah, don't be jealous, my followers, but the dude who picks up my garbage is in-fucking-fallible.

But, you know who you can't trust? My doctor. He told me he was pretty sure I would have this baby before my next appointment. Well, appointment is 4:15 on Monday and I don't see any baby. Just sayin'.